What are the differences between happy people and unhappy people? Of course, it should be very obvious: happy people
are happy while unhappy people are unhappy, right? Well, that is correct. But, we want to know what happy people do
differently, so I have put together a list of things that happy people do differently than unhappy people.
1. Love vs. Fear
Well, I can tell you for sure that those people who are
really happy, fear less and love a lot more. They see each
moment, each challenge, each person as an opportunity to
discover more about themselves and the world around them.
2. Acceptance vs. Resistance
Happy people understand that you can’t really change a
situation by resisting it, but you can definitely change it
by accepting that it is there and by understanding that
there might be a reason for its existence.
When something unpleasant happens to them, they don’t try to
fight it (they know that this will make the situation even
worse), but they ask themselves questions like: What can I
learn from this? How can I make this better? And then they
focus on the positive, rather than on the negative. They
always seem to see the glass half full, no matter what
happens to them.
3. Forgiveness vs. Unforgiveness
Really happy people know that it’s not healthy to hold on to
anger. They choose to forgive and forget, understanding that
forgiveness is a gift they give to themselves first and
“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the
intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who
gets burned.” ~ Buddha
4. Trust vs. Doubt
They trust themselves and they trust the people around them.
Whether they are talking to the cleaning lady or the C.E.O.
of a billion-dollar company, somehow they always seem make
the person they are interacting with feel that there is
something unique and special about them. They understand
that beliefs are self-fulfilling prophecies.
Because of that, they make sure to treat everyone with love,
dignity and respect, and make no distinction between age,
sex, social status, color, religion or race.
These are the great men that
Mark Twain was talking about:
“Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions.
Small people always do that, but the really great make you
feel that you, too, can become great.”
5. Meaning vs. Ambition
They do the things they do because of the meaning it brings
into their lives and because it gives their lives a sense of
purpose. They understand that “Doing what you love is the
cornerstone of having abundance in your life” as Wayne Dyer
And they care more about living a life full of meaning than
what, in our modern society we would call, living a
successful life. The irony here is that most of the time
they get both success and meaning because they choose to
focus on doing the things they love the most and they always
pursue their heart‘s desires. They are not motivated by
money; they want to make a difference in the lives of those
around them and in the world.
“Ultimately, man should not ask what the meaning of his life
is, but rather must recognize that it is he who is asked. In
a word, each man is questioned by life; and he can only
answer to life by answering for his own life; to life he can
only respond by being responsible.”
~ Viktor E. Frankl,
Man’s Search for Meaning
6. Praising vs. Criticizing
Happy people would probably agree with Carl’s Jung theory on
resistance: “What you resist not only persists, but will
grow in size.” They don’t criticize the absence of the
behavior they want to reinforce, rather, they know by
praising the person and the behavior they wish to reinforce
(even if it’s not often), they will actually encourage the
When a parent wants to make sure their 7 year old boy will
learn to always put the toys back in the box after he’s done
playing with them, they make sure not to focus on the many
times the child didn’t do it, criticizing him and his
behavior, but every time the little boy does put the toys
back, the parent praises him and his behavior and that is
exactly how they reinforce the positive behavior, and in the
end get the wanted results.
7. Challenges vs. Problems
Happy people will see problems as challenges, as
opportunities to explore new ways of doing things,
expressing their gratitude for them, understanding that
underneath them all lay many opportunities that will allow
them to expand and to grow.
8. Selflessness vs. Selfishness
They do what they do not for themselves, but for the good of
others, making sure that they bring meaning, empowerment and
happiness to the lives of many. They look for ways to give
and to share the best of themselves with the world and to
make other people happy.
~Seller’s Success Story~
How my client received 23% more for his home than his anticipated list price!
I suggested adding $1,700 for granite counter tops in the kitchen ....